Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize