I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
