fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
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