my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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