But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
