ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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