My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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