I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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