Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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