how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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