To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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