i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize