Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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