Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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