Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
