Ambien. No doubt about it.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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