His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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