Who did Billy Mays play for?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF