If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize