I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
