4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Girls should come with a carfax report
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
