Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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