new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
