He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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