STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
