I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
