Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
So much Jack, so little girl.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Randomize
