He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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