the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
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Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
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I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
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