I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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