So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
