if only i could text you this smell
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
