Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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