we're blogging at a bar
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I have already put on my inside pants.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize