I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
