Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
