Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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