singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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