Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
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I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
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My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
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