Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
