my vag is so smooth its legendary
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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