just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
