you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
