hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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