You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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