I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
