i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
