just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
