we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
