I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
