i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize