I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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