you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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